Setting The Family Table For Dinner!

The dinner table has been a special place for our family to connect with each other and share our days experiences. The dinner table was a place where we made family decisions, made vacation plans,  plans for the weekend, upcoming activities we were involved in school which others could attend, and more. Conversation at the dinner table was always pleasant. Any conversation that could evoke negative emotions was forbidden at the table. 

We always helped mother in the kitchen. I remember helping her as early as 4 years old. Starting with simple things such as setting the silverware on the table. Mother was so patient with us as she taught us where the different pieces went on the table. She was always positive and reinforced when we did something right and pleasant when she told us how to correct something we had done wrong. Through her encouragement and as we got older we accepted more responsibility for the family dinner table.

There was always a tablecloth on the table. We had everyday and special occasion dishes. We were taught there are 3 ways to set a table, Casual, Informal and Formal. The utensils and dishes used would depend on the occasion and the number of courses the dinner consisted of. A nicely set table no matter how simple sets the tone for a nice dinner.

My everyday dinner table is set casual style with the plate in the center of the place mat. The knife to the right of the plate with the blade turned into the plate and then the spoon to the right of the knife. On the left hand side I place the forks. The dinner fork is closest to the plate and the salad fork to the right of that. Above the plate to the right you will find the glass and to the upper left a bread plate if needed. The napkin is placed to the left of the plate under the forks. I like to use cloth napkins with napkin ring. If you use napkin ring you may place them to the left of the forks or in the center of the plate. As a child I always loved the napkins in the ring. I felt special and made the dinner more of an event.

My desire is to bring the family meal and table back. It's time we get back to basics. Unfortunately our society has sent us all in different directions. We need to share the family table experience with each other which will bring a closer bond to the family.

So let's turn off the television, put down the electronics and spend time getting to know each other.

Good Old Fashioned Table Manners

What has happened to “Table Manners”? I have noticed that more and more adults and children have no concept of acceptable table manners. People are hovering over their plates/bowls shoveling food in their mouths as if it were their last meal or they act as if they are starving to death. Chewing with mouths open and talking while their mouths are full. I blame modern day society and the fact that the family table is becoming obsolete. 

While dining out in restaurants I have noticed more electronics at the dinner table being used by adults and children. So tell me this…what is the point of going to dinner with your family at a nice restaurant if you are buried in electronics?

Things to remember and practice at the table:

1. Sit up straight.
2. Napkin in lap and use it.
3. Elbows off the table.
4. Do not start eating until everyone is seated and the head of the household starts or grace has been said.
5.  Hands in lap while chewing your food.
6. Chew food with your mouth closed.
7. No talking while you have food in your mouth.
8. Wait until you are done chewing before you sip or swallow a drink.
9. Ask for food to be passed to you rather than reaching across the table.
10. Always asked to be excused when you are finished.

Growing up our parents always sat and ate dinner with us. They were the examples and taught us how to behave at the table. We learned dinner conversation and what was and was not appropriate dinner conversation. Dinner was a social event it was the time of day when we all sat together and discussed our day. There was no watching television. We didn’t have cell phones back in the day, so there was no distraction at the table and everyone was an active participant in the meal.

Dinner was the same way when my children were at home and remains the same today with the grandchildren. We work with our grandchildren on manners and acceptable behavior at the table. The dinner table is a “No Electronics Allowed Zone!”

I think it is time that everyone gets back to the family dinner table without television and electronics and learn to socialize with each other.